Maxim Magazine, the most popular publication among dudes 14 to 16, recently compiled a top 5 list of the “unsexiest women alive.” Ranking number 1 and narrowly beating out Amy Winehouse was Ms. Sex and the City herself, Sarah Jessica Parker.
I have to ask myself what the people at Maxim were thinking when they put this list together in the first place. Don’t get me wrong, I love a good top 5 list, but unsexy women? Second, have you seenAmy Winehouse?? She’s the epitome of gross. Even the other women on the list I can agree with: Sandra Oh from Grey’s Anatomy, Madonna, and Britney Spears. I’m not saying I have a huge crush on Sarah J, but up against those other chicks, I really can’t see what was their motivation was.
To catch you up a tad, Axl Rose, the singer and sole remaining original member of Guns N’ Roses, has been working on a new album for more than a decade. The album, titled Chinese Democracy, has become something of a legend because it’s been in production for so long and has been delayed so many times. You’d think someone could have had the common courtesy to leak it on the internet by now.
For some weird reason, Dr. Pepper (yes, the soft drink company) has offered a reward of sorts if the band manages to release the album in 2008. Everyone in the United States will receive a free Dr. Pepper if the album sees the light of day this year, the only exceptions being former GNR guitarists Slash and Buckethead. No Dr. Pepper for them.
I can’t imagine the motivation behind this campaign but I’ll take a free Dr. Pepper. Will I buy the album? Probably not. Would you?
Just this morning I had to fight (nay, wrestle) the temptation to hit McDonald’s on the way to work. I was craving an Egg McMuffin but I stayed strong and resisted. My man-boobs don’t need the encouragement.
Then comes news that the person responsible for creating that delectable breakfast sandwich, Herb Peterson, passed away on Tuesday. I can’t help but wonder if it was Herb himself pushing me toward that drive-thru today. Tomorrow morning I’ll have to stop at McDonald’s in honor of the man that made so many chubby kids happy on their way to school.
Believe it or not, I eat every day. Sometimes even multiple times per day. Usually when I’m eating, I like to put the food in my mouth and chew it. Apparently this tactic could cost me some serious TV news time.
This dude in Texas (shocking) found Jesus…in his bag of Cheetos. I would have said it looks like a young Robert Plant sitting indian-style offering a puff of his peace pipe…but to each his own I guess.
Do you think that if someone eats one of these holy food items (Cheeto, grilled cheese, etc.), their poop comes out shaped like the devil? Talk about holy shit…..thank you, thank you…I’ll be here all night.
Here’s a scenario for you. You’re getting dressed to go out for a night on the town when suddenly you remember that the bar you’re going to is surrounded by ghetto and there’s an unusually high volume of crime in the area. You’ve got two options: 1. Pick a different bar that doesn’t come with a risk of being attacked, or 2. Put on your $200 mesh shirt that will protect you from those pesky muggers. Apparently there are people that would choose the latter.
This shirt is made of “ultrahigh molecular weight polyethylene fiber” that will withstand a stabbing. It’s also lightweight and machine washable. Yay!
I don’t think I have to tell you how silly this is. The shirts cost anywhere from $200 to $500 for short and long sleeve varieties. If you are regularly forced to walk through areas of town that are dangerous, you’ll either need to buy multiple ones, setting you back thousands of dollars, or do laundry every night. Seriously, if that’s your situation, then maybe you need a new house/routine/job/place to hang out.
This video is absolutely amazing. The little girl side of me was sad for the first part of it but by the end I found myself rooting for the buffalo like they were my favorite football team. Ok I’ll shut up now..just watch it.
Today marks the end of our Shipyard swag giveaway contest. We’d like to thank everyone that took the time to enter…all of the submissions were absolutely awesome!
I really don’t know what I can say about these little guys that you haven’t already thought to yourself. They’re stuffed dolls shaped like a drop of urine and a little turd….and they’re awesome! Looks like my Christmas shopping is done.
To catch you up a tad, Axl Rose, the singer and sole remaining original member of Guns N’ Roses, has been working on a new album for more than a decade. The album, titled Chinese Democracy, has become something of a legend because it’s been in production for so long and has been delayed so many times. You’d think someone could have had the common courtesy to leak it on the internet by now.
Just this morning I had to fight (nay, wrestle) the temptation to hit McDonald’s on the way to work. I was craving an Egg McMuffin but I stayed strong and resisted. My man-boobs don’t need the encouragement.
Here’s a scenario for you. You’re getting dressed to go out for a night on the town when suddenly you remember that the bar you’re going to is surrounded by ghetto and there’s an unusually high volume of crime in the area. You’ve got two options: 1. Pick a different bar that doesn’t come with a risk of being attacked, or 2. Put on your $200 mesh shirt that will protect you from those pesky muggers. Apparently there are people that would choose the latter.
Today marks the end of our Shipyard swag giveaway contest. We’d like to thank everyone that took the time to enter…all of the submissions were absolutely awesome!
